The 89th minute

In 1990 Saddam Hussein’s Iraq invaded Kuwait on its national holiday when most of its soldiers were at home having BBQ’s. In the United States determined Senators stand up and read from the phone book in order filibuster laws. In the UK, Tories sneak their MP’s into Westminster backrooms before key votes to fool the Labour whips into thinking there is no need to round up their own guys. In courts all over the world lawyers invoke unheard of and antiquated laws to get their clients off the hook. In Tony Blair’s election campaign of 1997 he flew to Australia to meet Rupert Murdoch and shortly afterwards ‘The Sun’ switched sides. In football, players will fake an injury to waste time and deny the opposing team a chance of equalising. George Bush ruined America’s reputation – but also circumnavigated the Geneva Convention – when he dreamt up the term ‘enemy combatant’. The Labour government eradicated hundreds of thousands of illegal immigrants over night by reclassifying them as something else. In 2001 Jo Moore, a British government spin-doctor was distastefully honest when she advised her colleagues that September 11th was a good day to bury bad news. GCSE’s, A-Levels and University exams all follow a set pattern - learn the rules of the game and you can always pass, regardless of your actual ability. A while ago some fellers built a giant wooden horse and played on an old convention of warfare to trick their way to victory. And of course Americans today defend an outdated constitutional law that allows them to form militias against the British so they can continue to butcher their fellow citizens.

What I am trying to say is that laws are meant to be sidestepped, stretched and rewritten. But never broken.

This morning I referred to a single paragraph in a rarely read pamphlet in order to sidestep my responsibilities for a further 48 hours. I abused a law that only really exists for retards and disabled kids but has to be applied to everyone for fear of injustice.

I didn’t cheat but I simply played the system. I feel cheap and dirty for it.

I am trying to remind myself that this is the way the world works. But it still doesn’t make me feel any more noble.